Articles written by Jase Graves

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 By Jase Graves    News    September 18, 2023

Dad's lumbar moving company

Recently, my wife and I accomplished a task almost as daunting as giving our cat a pill or teaching our youngest daughter to drive without committing widespread curb trauma. In two days, we managed to move our two older daughters (and several cargo c...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    August 7, 2023

A summer staycation travel guide

Are you tired of financing a tank of gas? Are you afraid your armpits might burst into flames if you leave the air-conditioned confines of your home? Or maybe, like our family, you blew a decade’s worth of vacation savings on a trip to New York Cit...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    July 3, 2023

A love letter to my generator

Dear Generac standby home generator, I want to apologize for calling down multiple elaborate curses upon you for being so expensive as you sat loitering beside the house almost completely idle for the three years since I financed you – despite the...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    May 29, 2023

How to "un-dorm" a college student

Every year in late spring, parents of college students all over America travel to university campuses with stylish IKEA storage bags or (in our case) cardboard boxes that once held bulk orders of toilet paper and tortilla chips. When the parents...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    March 27, 2023

Spring broke

When my three semi-grown daughters were young (and since I work in the lucrative world of public education), we’d spend our spring break holidays riding bikes to the park, making dad-sized pillow forts in the living room, and raiding the gift shop...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    March 20, 2023

To drive or not to drive

Along with identifying as “Swifties,” ignoring the reported Chinese threat of bad dancing posed by TikTok, and pretending that plant-based meat is actually edible, many young people in America are engaging in another fascinating trend – not...

 

Escape from New York and Southwest Airlines

In the 1980s, I repeatedly watched a recorded copy of the film "Escape from New York" on my family's Panasonic VCR – complete with tuning knobs the size of hubcaps. Little did I know that I would...

 

Christmas lights: A judgmental guide

 One of my fondest childhood memories of Christmas in the 1970’s was riding around in the family station wagon, “Bessie,” to look at Christmas lights while I whined to my parents about needing a snack – again. There was something magical ab...

 

What's in my name?

I've experienced a lifelong identity crisis, of sorts, because of my name (or names), and I've actually kind of enjoyed it – most of the time. The controversy began in 1970, around the time that I made my almost 10-pound newborn debut (sorry,...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    August 15, 2022

If you can't beat the heat, join it

East Texas is hot, and not in the way you compliment your wife when she's mad at you for performing an epic cannonball while she's lounging by the pool with her laptop. For the past few weeks, Texas (and much of the world) has been suffering through...

 

Have you seen my wallet?

I have a problem. I misplace my wallet – a lot. In fact, if losing wallets was an Olympic sport, I'm pretty sure I'd be investigated for doping. And according to a 2018 survey by MoneyTips, I'm not...

 

A lifetime case of the girl crazies

I was recently invited to speak at a local women's organization meeting in my hometown. Apparently, I was pretty much their last option, right behind the auto-warranty telemarketer and the tax auditor...

 

Are you too old for Santa Clause?

Children all over the United States are currently wringing their iPhone-calloused hands over the possibility that Santa Claus might not make it this year because he's trapped in a delayed shipping...

 

School project management

Raising three daughters has come with many delights, challenges, prayers and moments standing in that certain aisle at Target trying to figure out the differences between “ultra,” “Infinity FlexFoam,” “overnight,” “sport,...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    August 23, 2021

Take a hike. Save a tick.

With blistering summer weather in full force and shiny new COVID-19 variants emerging like another season of "The Bachelor," many Americans have taken to the great outdoors–despite recently...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    June 14, 2021

Teach a man to fish, or not

You may have heard the proverb, "Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you'll feed him for a lifetime of crushing debt after he buys the boat, trailer, tackle,...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    March 29, 2021

Resurrecting Easter

Holidays are a big deal at my house. While raising our three daughters, my wife and I have thoroughly enjoyed Halloween costumes, visits from the Easter Bunny, and Valentine's Day parties - and we...

 

Get your mind off politics

As some people age, they begin to lose a certain degree of excitement about simple life experiences like snow days, finding a penny in a parking lot or putting on a pair of fresh underwear still warm...

 

All I want for Christmas is the new vaccine!

Now that we are well into the month of December, my three teenage daughters have provided me with their extensive Christmas lists – both electronic and hard copies – in triplicate. Full of the...

 

Elect to talk politics with the family

I usually avoid discussing politics in my columns, mainly because I would rather not be disowned by family members, unfriended by friends, or doused with milkshakes and other beverages by complete strangers at the local Whataburger. This time,...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    May 18, 2020

Cooking my way through quarantine

Ever since our local mayor issued a COVID-19 shelter-in-place-and-go-completely-cocoa bananas order, my family and I have found ourselves cooking more than we have for our entire lives. We’ve even been following recipes and using the actual...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    April 13, 2020

Survive the supermarket with social distancing

As we adjust our daily schedules to the reality of the COVID-19 pandemic, many families are suffering from acute boredom. Students are suspending their homeschool teachers without pay for excessive grouchiness, children are traumatizing their pets by...

 
 By Jase Graves    Opinion    March 2, 2020

Swimsuit shopping: a cautionary tale

On a recent frigid day in February as I was entering Target to defrost my nose hairs and purchase a designer toilet brush, I noticed that they already had an array of skimpy women’s swimsuits on display, which dredged up some disturbing memories...

 
 By Jase Graves    News    January 6, 2020

Beating the after-Christmas blues

Following all of the frantic seasonal preparations, including at least 15 trips to Walmart for more almond bark, the abrupt conclusion of the festivities can come as quite a shock­— and not just to the digestive system. I often suffer acutely from...

 

Deck the hall and hit the deck

Yes, I am one of “those” people. About 30 minutes after Labor Day has officially ended, I feel a strange compulsion to binge on my mother’s iced sugar cookies shaped like snowmen while listening to Nat King Cole croon about chestnuts. I...

 

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