Eyes that see the good in things- May 20, 2019

Have you ever experienced times when you offered to do something for someone and then you basically blew it off? Not intentionally, of course. Just one of those things when life gets in the way, you got busy… other things came up… and you just forgot?

My one saving grace is that it hadn’t yet reached the stage where they were counting on my contribution yet because they had still been in the early planning stages at the time. Which is a good thing because life happened, and I never thought of it again.

Some good life things like that new grandson of mine, who is doing so well, by the way. Some not so good things like a couple of days without water while the pump and pressure tank for the well got replaced. More medical appointments and a funeral for a 22-year old cousin killed in a car accident.

So, yes, they were important life things, but it didn’t keep me from feeling terrible because it was honestly something that I wanted to do. I have some really awesome cousins who have tons of energy. They are doing a Scandinavian coffee party for the residents and staff of the home where their mother is living, and I wanted to help bake for it. But I forgot until it was too late, and they have everything done.

Life is like that sometimes. Sometimes, it’s my fault. I screw up. I forget. I make mistakes. It helps me to remember that everyone has times like that, and it helps me to temper the impatience that I feel with them.

I know you’ve had those same kinds of experiences. Times when the driver ahead of you is making you crazy… they slow down, then speed up, only to slow down again while they weave a little as they check out the scenery. Or maybe it is that person who just passed you on the right side of the road because they couldn’t pass you on the left. Or maybe it was the frustration you felt with the person who left their shopping cart in the middle of the parking lot. Maybe you weren’t treated so nicely by that cashier or your favorite item at the bakery was sold out when you got there.

When things like that happen, how do you react? If it’s you who screwed up, do you get angry with yourself? Or, if it was someone or something else, how do you respond?

I recently had an interesting screen pop up when I was doing an internet search. The screen said. “Whoops, this is awkward. Something’s wrong. Jump twice in the air and then put on a big smile! It won’t help fix the problem but it’s fun! And you can try again later.”

Instead of being annoyed that the search didn’t work, this quirky message made me smile. And even though I didn’t get the page I was hoping for, I wondered if maybe this was the quote I needed to read.

You see, I’ve learned something about myself that my family members have probably known for a long time. I’m not entirely proud of it but I like to be in control of my situation. At least I like to have some semblance of control. I like for things to go my way and I like to make the decisions. Because, of course, my ideas are clearly better, more fun, right, etc.– aren’t they?

Well…sometimes it works out and I have control over things and sometimes it doesn’t. Even though I know this about me, the ongoing battle is handling things that don’t go my way in a way that I am proud of. Flipping the negative to a positive. Not making someone else feel bad in the process. Not letting my emotions ruin more than a small part of my day.

I once heard a teacher say that she imagined herself with an invisible tool belt around her waist and that her job as an adult learner was to keep adding tools to this tool belt. Tools that will help her be happier, healthier, more fulfilled, nicer and all of the other characteristics she strived to be.

She told us that studying, writing, and researching personal development for the last dozen or so years has left her with quite a tool belt— but she said she still struggles with the basics now and then.

As I have been thinking about that screen, it made me think that it would be great to add something funny to MY toolkit. Rather than complaining, pouting, brooding, or beating myself up, I could think of something funny. What if I jumped twice and put on that smile? I hear you, I might not actually do those things, either.

But, what if we started doing something funny in our minds? Like a ‘virtual funny’, maybe that would make us smile on the inside! If we did something funny, the sheer lunacy of it all could shift our mood in these kinds of situations.

The thing is, it’s not about being perfect, it’s about trying our best to get though the little issues that drive us just a little crazy. It’s about trying to get through another day in this beautiful, yet frustrating world we live in. And to get through the day with a smile on our face and love in our hearts.

We would love to share local stories about the good things your eyes are seeing.

Stop in to share your stories with us, give us a call at 947-2417 or e-mail us at [email protected]. Or send a letter to Eyes That See the Good in Things, c/o Allison Lindgren, The Transcript 6 8th St N., New Rockford, ND 58356.